It’s the moment that makes you question everything.
You’re up before dawn packing lunches, answering Slack messages in the preschool parking lot, and booking yet another sitter because your boss just scheduled a 5 p.m. meeting. Then comes the daycare tuition hike. The email announcing your hybrid schedule is gone. The “do more with less” staff meeting that makes you wonder who’s left to pick up the slack.
And suddenly, you start doing the mental math—how long can you keep this up before something breaks?
For the first time in years, the number of mothers with young children in the labor force is sliding fast enough to erase much of the post-pandemic rebound. Federal data analyzed by Misty Heggeness, a University of Kansas professor and former principal economist at the U.S. Census Bureau, shows the share of working moms ages 25–44 with young children has been shrinking for most of this year—dropping nearly three percentage points since January to its lowest point in more than three years.
“It’s clear that we’re backsliding in the Ken-ergy economy, that the return-to-office chest pounding is having a real ripple effect,” Heggeness told The Washington Post.
Motherly’s State of Motherhood 2025 report paints a parallel picture of the pressures influencing moms’ career decisions—different data, same underlying strain:
- 54% say childcare is barely or not at all affordable.
- 39% cite childcare costs as one of their top two financial burdens, second only to overall financial uncertainty.
- 50% of Millennial and 52% of Gen Z moms have considered leaving their jobs because the stress and cost of childcare outweigh earnings.
And in our Instagram poll of over 1.1 million followers, 79% said they’d thought about stepping away from work in the past year due to child care costs and/or return-to-office demands.
Why this wave feels different
Some of the reasons are familiar—sky-high child care bills, rigid scheduling—but this year’s drop is being fueled by a perfect storm hitting all at once:
- Corporate and government rollbacks on flexibility: not just private sector return-to-office mandates, but also cuts to public sector jobs long considered “caregiver-friendly.”
- A cooling job market: fewer openings make it harder to re-enter, pushing some women toward career changes or longer breaks.
- Cultural and political crosscurrents: while some women are leaving by necessity, others are opting out by choice, aligning with social movements or personal definitions of success that center home life.
The difference now? The safety nets moms relied on are vanishing faster than they can be replaced. For years, the narrative was that hybrid work would keep more moms in the labor force. Now, the infrastructure that made balancing career and caregiving possible is being dismantled in real time.
Related: 6 moms reveal why they left the workforce in the last year
The moment moms reached their breaking point
For many, the decision to leave wasn’t a single “I’m done” moment—it was months, sometimes years, of tiny sacrifices stacking up into an impossible load.
It was a slow build of daily compromises and impossible trade-offs. Some described reaching a point where exhaustion, mental health struggles, and constant scheduling conflicts made staying feel unsustainable.
- “I was having regular anxious and depressive episodes.” – @erinmjean
- “I could have a better work–life–home life balance.” – @tlamov
- “If I could balance both and had better child care options and didn’t have postpartum.” – @juliaohrreally
Others pointed to the cumulative frustration of being away from home too much, missing family milestones, or feeling like their needs as caregivers were invisible at work.
- “It was possible to do my job and not be away from home constantly.” – @_megburrell
- “If there were more jobs or bosses that didn’t make you feel bad for putting family first.” – @crwolff95
The equity gap behind the numbers
This shift isn’t hitting all moms equally. Early indicators suggest Black women and women in their late twenties to early thirties are feeling the most immediate impact, facing both job losses and steeper hurdles to re-employment. For moms already navigating racial or economic inequities, the combination of lost income and reduced access to supportive workplace policies deepens the gap.
Motherly readers have told us that it’s not just the logistics—it’s the message these changes send: that caregiving is incompatible with career ambition, and that flexibility was a temporary pandemic “perk” rather than an ongoing necessity.
What employers can do to better support moms
When asked what might have made them stay, moms overwhelmingly called for flexibility, fair pay, and workplaces that actively support parents rather than penalize them. Their suggestions were clear and actionable:
1. Protect working hours
- “Colleagues kept meetings within working hours! (9–5)” – @emmagems
2. Offer flexible or remote work options
- “Work from home.” – @lils426
- “True part-time positions, 9am–2pm.” – @meganhelton9
- “My job remained remote.” – @soniavarughese
3. Ensure adequate pay and benefits
- “I made more money and have more than 10 sick days a year.” – @kristin_o_sampson
- “I got paid maternity leave. Not an option for my job.” – @hilary.monro
4. Create parent-friendly policies
- “Support for parents: sick days without having to do the missed work at night, reasonable hours.” – @alicia_drea
- “I could take an unlimited number of kid sick days (even unpaid).” – @jill_allatta
5. Foster a supportive culture
- “Leaders were parent friendly.” – @whintstagram
- “Managers didn’t bow down to clients and put team members in a poor situation.” – @ktints14
These responses make it clear: when employers build flexibility, empathy, and realistic expectations into their workplaces, moms are far more likely to stay — and thrive.
The long game—and the risk
Stepping away can bring short-term relief, but economists warn the long-term consequences are steep:
- Lower lifetime earnings
- Slower advancement into leadership roles
- Re-entry into jobs that may pay less than pre-exit positions
Our own State of Motherhood data shows only 9% of moms feel their voices are heard in policymaking—a gap that leaves little faith that systemic solutions are on the way. Without urgent investment in childcare infrastructure and parent-friendly work policies, this year’s drop could mark the start of a longer slide.
If you’re deciding whether to stay or step back
Before making a decision, career coaches recommend considering:
- Run the numbers: Factor in not just take-home pay but benefits, retirement contributions, and career momentum.
- Explore all flexibility options: Compressed weeks, part-time roles, job shares, or contract work can sometimes bridge the gap.
- Tap into community resources: Sites like ChildCare.gov list subsidies, grants, and tax credits.
- Keep your network alive: Even a quarterly check-in with peers can make re-entry smoother.
Related: New calculator shows the cost moms pay for stepping back from the workforce
Where we go from here
Affordable child care, real flexibility, and workplaces that understand the realities of parenting are what help families stay steady. When that support disappears, mothers can lose income, career momentum, and the capacity to be fully present at home.
Small shifts can start with everyday choices—how schedules are set, how teams communicate, and how leaders respond when caregiving needs arise. When moms are supported, they can keep contributing at work without sacrificing their families’ well-being, and everyone benefits.