Every mom knows the invisible weight of running a household—the endless mental notes, reminders, and invisible decisions that keep a family running. For one mom, relief came from an unexpected source: AI.
About six months ago, Lilian Schmidt posted a TikTok that struck a nerve with parents everywhere. “I asked ChatGPT to act as a co-parent that handles 97% of my mental load,” the on-screen text read.
In the now-viral clip (@heylilianschmidt), which has now surpassed 2,90,000 views, Schmidt speaks to camera with a mix of disbelief and relief:
“Why did no one tell me this sooner?” she says. “It’s not the tasks that drain you—it’s the thinking, planning, anticipating, and deciding that never stop.”
“Why did no one tell me this sooner?” she says. “It’s not the tasks that drain you—it’s the thinking, planning, anticipating, and deciding that never stop.”
@heylilianschmidt Why did no one tell me this sooner 😭😭 No but seriously, ChatGPT literally changed my entire life: As a full-time working mom to a toddler and bonus mom to a teenager, my life felt so overwhelming and stressful for 3.5 years. It was not about the actual tasks – I didn’t mind changing diapers, reading books, taking my daughter to the playground, or watching my bonus son‘s soccer practice. Because it meant spending time with THEM. But I did mind all the thinking, planning, anticipating, researching, decision-making, and managing that makes parenting so exhausting. The mental load and invisible labor moms do ever single day – but no one sees it. I always felt like my brain was running a marathon of mental to-dos – and I struggled with really being present in the moment and enjoying mom life 😢 And so one day, I asked ChatGPT to take that weight off my shoulder. To act as my back-up brain when mine felt like cotton candy and empt batteries 🪫 To handle my mental load as someone who actually GETS it – like an additional AI co-parent. And the second it responded, I felt me shoulders drop and my brain FINALLY went quiet 🧘♀️ ChatGPT now: 🌮 plans meals based on our family favorites and dietary restrictions 🛒 writes the grocery list, sorted by aisle, and makes sure we save $$ every time 🏠 helped us get our messy home on autopilot 😴 fixed our bedtime routine so it takes 20 minutes and not 3 hours (and without any power struggles) 🔬 helps me research typical mom questions („how much screen time is too much??“, „it’s raining outside and everyone’s bored – what do we do??“) ⏳ saves me HOURS ever week (so I actually get time for myself without the guilt ☺️) And all I’m wondering is: why the heck did no one tell me that: ChatGPT = INSTANT mental relief 💆♀️ ??? That’s why I’m here to tell YOU 😅 🎁 If you wanna get started with a done-for-you prompt system that solved 97% of my mental load, COMMENT „vault“ and I’ll send you the link! 🫶 (or grab it right from my bio!) 🤖 And if you want to have an ACTUAL AI Co-Parent assistant, comment „CO-PARENT“ to get on the waitlist! 😍 It’s time us moms finally claim our time, happiness and sanity back!! 🫶 #momhacks #chatgptformoms #mombrain #mentalload #motherhoodjourney ♬ Good Life – OneRepublic
Schmidt, a full-time working mom to a toddler and bonus mom to a teenager, describes how she used to spend nights battling bedtime routines that stretched to three exhausting hours. Then she turned to AI for advice, and ChatGPT suggested the opposite of what she’d been trying (letting her daughter burn off energy before winding down). “She fell asleep in five minutes,” Schmidt told Business Insider.
From there, Schmidt started using ChatGPT to manage everything from meal planning and grocery lists to research questions and routine tweaks. “My brain finally went quiet,” she said.
Related: Pregnant mom felt one strange symptom—ChatGPT told her to act fast, and it saved her and her baby
What moms are using AI for right now
Schmidt isn’t alone. Across TikTok and parenting forums, moms are turning to AI tools to lighten the invisible load of family life.
Here’s what they’re using it for:
- Meal planning based on family favourites and dietary restrictions.
- Aisle-sorted grocery lists that include cheaper swaps.
- Calendar merges for school, homework, and after-school activities.
- Bedtime tune-ups that actually work.
- Rainy-day activity ideas using what’s already at home.
- Packing lists for daycare or trips.
Experts say it’s no wonder the trend is catching on. “Parents are being pulled in a lot of different directions,” said Lorain Moorehead to Business Insider , a licensed therapist and professor at Arizona State University, “AI can be a great support for keeping things organised and reducing that mental load.”
The ground rules (read this before you try it)
Before you invite AI into your parenting routine, a few boundaries matter:
- Privacy first: Never include names, schools, addresses, or medical information.
- Medical/mental health line: AI is not a paediatrician or therapist. Seek human advice for those concerns.
- Bias check: AI tools can be opinionated—treat outputs as drafts, not gospel.
- Data hygiene: Use tools that cite sources, allow you to delete history, or offer guest mode.
Mainstream experts (including those quoted by The Washington Post) warn that while AI may ease daily logistics, it’s important to understand where your data goes and who has access to it.
Make it equitable (so the “helper” doesn’t become Mom’s new job)
Used right, an “AI mental-load helper” should serve the family, not just the mother. Try these small shifts:
- Shared prompt home base: Keep a single pinned “family ops” prompt in a shared account.
- Rotate ownership: Week A = your partner; Week B = you; Week C = your older teen for age-appropriate tasks.
- Define success: Less texting about dinner, clearer bedtime flow, fewer last-minute scrambles.
Mini script: “Can you take the lead on pasting our prompt and posting the plan by Sunday night?”
Copy-paste prompts that respect safety
- Meal plan: “We’re a family of 4. One picky, no spicy. Ingredients on hand: __. Create a 5-day plan with 30-minute dinners and a grocery list grouped by aisle.”
- Calendar merge: “Create a weekly schedule from these blocks: school 8–3, homework 30–45 min, baseball Tu/Th 5–6, bedtime routine 7:15–8:00. Add two 15-min tidy-ups.”
- Bedtime tune-up: “Suggest 3 pre-bed wind-down options for a high-energy 4-year-old; avoid screens.”
- Rainy-day kit: “List 10 indoor activities that use only paper, crayons, and tape; include clean-up time.”
Safety tip: Never include your child’s name, school, or location in prompts.
Where AI helps most (and where it flops)
AI shines when the task is clear and structured, such as meal planning, packing checklists, or fine-tuning your family’s weekly schedule. It can help you sort, simplify, and see patterns you might miss when your brain is juggling ten other things.
But when it comes to the messy, human side of parenting—sibling squabbles, big emotions, or questions that touch on your child’s development—AI still can’t replace your instincts. Those moments need empathy, not algorithms.
The bottom line: Let AI handle the logistics, not the love. Use it to lighten the load, but keep the decisions and the heart human.
Related: Parents are turning to ChatGPT for medical advice. But is it safe?
Realistic expectations & time-back math
When used wisely, AI can free up 30–60 minutes a week—the time moms often spend toggling between tabs and tasks. For Schmidt, that’s meant quieter evenings and more presence: bedtime stories, walks, even spontaneous moments like holding her daughter’s horse during riding lessons.
As noted in Business Insider, experts emphasise that while AI can help reduce the day-to-day workload, it doesn’t solve deeper inequities in household or parenting responsibilities—these still require open communication, collaboration, and shared accountability among family members.
If AI is entering your family life, let it carry the paperwork of parenting, not the heart of it. The tech can sort your to-dos, but it’s you who brings meaning to the moments in between.
Or as Schmidt puts it, “When you’re old and your kids are all grown up, they’ll remember if you were present, not if you wrote the perfect grocery list.”
Source:
- Business Insider. 2025. “A mom went viral for co-parenting her kids with AI. More parents are using it for to-do lists and even coaching.”